SOCIAL MEDIA

Monday, September 17, 2018

My Fears and Worst Habits

A couple weeks ago, Kait blogged about her biggest fears and her worst habits. She said she did this blogging challenge as a way to spice up her blogging as she was feeling uninspired. I hear you friend. So I thought I would share with you some of my fears and my worst habits. Enjoy. Hopefully I don't scare you off.

FEARS

Sharks. I am sooooo afraid of sharks. I have dreams about them and being eaten by them. But I definitely fear my fear when I watch Shark Week or shark attack videos. Yep, I mentioned it awhile ago, but I have a fascination with shark attack videos. They are such powerful creatures that I want to know everything about them.

Dying alone. I always get so choked up when I learn that someone has physically died alone. I would hate to take my last breath and know that no one was around me when I went. I want to see my loved ones faces before I go. I feel like I would feel more at peace that way.

My dog dying. I can't even type that out without tearing up. I love Walter so much. He is our little companion and my heart. He is my first "child" and I can't imagine life without him. When my childhood cat passed away (at 19 years), I had the hardest time. I went to my parents house to say goodbye to him just in case they needed to put him down (he was having trouble going to the bathroom, sitting and losing weight) and when my mom left to go to the vet, I cried in their driveway. I was laying in their driveway until my mom came back with his body.

I was so sad that she didn't let me go with her, but she said she wanted me to have happy memories of him and not see him like that. I get that now, but not then.

I just fear the day when my pup goes.

Losing my family. Enough said.

Flying. This one may seem weird since I fly all the time, but I get a little stomach twist, close my eyes and say a little prayer every time I fly. I just read too many stories and that fuels my fear.

Burglary/Home invasion. Our house was burglarized in 2011. I know I have wrote about this before on my blog, but if you are new or forgot, I will summarize it. It was a Monday morning and I had a bad feeling while I got ready in the morning, but I brushed it off and went on with my day. One thing that stands out to me was thinking I should hide my laptop.

Anyways, we went to work and came home and Rory went over to our neighbors house for something, so I went to the back of our house to go through another door (our front door swells and is hard to get open sometimes). This was normal for us. When I went in backyard, a few of our boards to our fence were missing between my neighbors house and ours. I didn't think much of it, but when I rounded the corner, I saw marks all over the back door. Like a crowbar tried to open it. Then I saw our bathroom window on the ground. And then I knew. I didn't even think and I unlocked the door and ran inside.

Our house was thrashed. They went through our garage, our kitchen, our living room, bedrooms, etc. They took so many things from our house. So many valuable things. It breaks my heart thinking about it. I ran out to Rory told him to come in and started to process it all. We called the police but it took them 4 hours to come over since no one was in the house. Ugh.

And then we started the process of filling out police reports, calling our homeowners insurance, etc. I hope no one ever goes through this.

So I definitely fear something like that happening again or even worse when we are home.

WORST HABITS

I bite/chew on my nails. I am definitely getting better about it, but when I get nervous or bored, I tend to bite or chew on my nails.

I am neurotic about cleaning. I took this one from Kait since I am definitely overly neurotic about cleaning. I need a clean house. I like a clean house and it probably drives my family crazy with how often I clean.

I am a worrier. I worry about everything. It is something that I constantly try to work on, but I worry. I worry about the what-ifs more than anything. I know this is dumb because most of the time those what-ifs never happen or they are so far fetched that they NEVER happen.

I am judgy. I hate being judgmental, but I often find I judge way more than I should. I hate admitting that I am judgy. Ha.

Over researching. When it comes to life, I research and google the shit out of everything. Case in point, before my septorhinoplasty, I googled what to expect, recovery, the actual procedure (even watched some Youtube videos) and real life accounts of it. I over research until I am either scared, satisfied or figured it out.

I am sure I have way more bad habits and fears, but these are the ones that came to mind right away.

28 comments :

  1. We are so similar with so many of these! I am terrified of a break in. And I over research like crazy! I have to take Xanax when I fly haha.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yes to all of these. I am so glad I am not the only one who feels this way. Are you blogging again?

      Delete
  2. I try so hard not to be judgy! I'm a worrier too. I fly a lot but no, I don't love it! I hate turbulence!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hate turbulence too. Especially over the ocean. Ugh

      Delete
  3. Girl, I can relate to many of these! My biggest fear is something happening to my children. Death has always scared me so much, too. And I think most of us are judgmental, whether we admit it or not -- so I think it's healthy to start by admitting it! Thanks for being vulnerable, friend.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You are very welcome. I loved reading Kait's post and then writing my own. It is hard to look into ourselves and see what isn't the best.

      Delete
  4. So many of my same fears and habits too. For me, it’s chewing my cuticles. Not only am I afraid of dying alone but of being all alone. Worried Mr. Nine will go before me and no one, even the kids, will come visit. It saddens me because I see how invisible the elderly become. Losing our Daisy....cannot.even.think about it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think about all of it too. Rory is 5 1/2 years older than me and it freaks me out that he may go before me one day. I fear being alone too. It is awful.

      Delete
  5. Oh my gosh... over researching seems like a nice way to put it - for me, its more like, DRIVE YOURSELF INSANE!!!!! my husband has had to take away my phone & computer to make me stop googling things. It's sad actually.
    Dying alone is one for me as well... & I cant even talk about pets dying. It's just the worst thing
    That made me chuckle that you are afraid to fly with all the flying you do. Me? I'm so afraid of it, I last flew probably 10 years ago & I'm good with never doing it again.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We are soooo alike in the over researching. I go crazy.

      You haven't flown in 10 years? Wow. I do fly a lot, but I try to sleep or think of something else when I do.

      Delete
  6. Fellow nail biter/chewer, i hate this habit the most and try to stop but it never works. I know will power, but seriously so hard to stop. I also can be judgy but then I remember I am one walking catastrophe and feel guilty.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is what I try to think about too in regards to being judgy. I know I am no walk in the park either. Ha.

      Delete
  7. Ugh my house was broken into in 2012 as well. It was a terrible experience and still haunts me. I had no insurance at the time but now I do! So sorry you had to deal with that too. I have reverted to being a nail chewer recently, I need to stop. I am also dreading the day Ginger dies, she is my only baby and I will have a really hard time!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I didn't know your house was broken into as well. That is just awful. It was one of the worst experiences. I have to stop biting my nails. I am the worst with it. Yep. It is awful to lose a pet. I don't want that day to ever come.

      Delete
  8. I can ditto all yours above! Lol!

    ReplyDelete
  9. Oh my gosh, I could have written this myself! We are SOOOO similar. I used to bite my nails something awful but finally stopped about ten years ago. Now I pick at the skin around my nails, though, and sometimes it ends up looking worse than when I bit my nails. Ugh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Haha. I still pick at my skin too. I am getting better with my nail biting though. It only happens when I am nervous or really bored...like on a plane. Ha.

      Delete
  10. Oh my gosh, a home invasion is definitely my worst fear. It happened to my parents shortly after they were married and I still get so creeped out whenever they talk about it. I used to be TERRIFIED of sharks, but now I love them (in a healthy, respectful way) of course. Have you ever tried gel nails? It's a bit of an investment, but it completely cured me of biting my nails and cuticles. Now I don't even get gel all the time (none since March) and I'm chew free!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I had gel nails for a long time, but the time commitment and the cost is what stopped me. But I do go get shelac done every so often and it totally helps. I think I would like sharks more if I lived around them and appreciated them more.

      Delete
  11. I'm a nail bitter too. Such a bad habit!

    ReplyDelete
  12. I'm not a fan of flying either. I get really bad anxiety when traveling but especially if I'm alone.

    ReplyDelete
  13. We are so much alike! LOL! All of your fears, yep, same! The only thing I don't do is the excessive cleaning, I wish I cleaned more haha

    ReplyDelete
  14. I am with you on most of those fears. And I'm totally a worrier, too. I literally can't stop!

    ReplyDelete
  15. We have so many similarities. I over research, over think and worry about everything. I have an irrational fear about someone breaking in our house, flying, something happening to my family. I also hate riding in a car when someone else is driving. People around here are idiots behind the wheel and I have been rear ended twice since moving to Birmingham. I remember reading your post about the break in. That is so scary and I still cant believe it took the police so long to come to you. Who cares if the people weren't there?? Your safety was compromised!!!

    ReplyDelete
  16. All of your traits and fears are so rational and unrelatable! I guess if you'd said you were worried about 'the aliens landing' you might not have had so many people saying they can relate :) Sharks are about the only animal I am scared of too - did you watch Jaws as a young child? I Think this is where my fear came from! So sorry your house got burgaled - I can't imagine how you even started to deal with that. I can imagine this was difficult for you to share but I am glad you did - it makes us all realise our own fears are not just our own! J xx

    ReplyDelete
  17. I don't ever want to encounter a shark up close but think they're interesting and fascinating creatures. I can see why you're scared of another burglary. That'd scare me too. I'm not afraid of death, but am afraid of dying.

    ReplyDelete